uncertain…

 

Sticking with uncertainty, getting the knack of relaxing in the midst of chaos, learning not to panic this is the spiritual path.
– Pema Chödrön

So much uncertainty. I have tried to write but it is hard for the words to form sentences. Living through this moment in time, is unlike anything I’ve ever experienced.

I try to stay busy. I gratefully speak to my mother and father and sister each day (and give thanks for FaceTime). I call my brother far away. I stay in touch with friends. I sit on my new screened-in porch. I watch winter move aside for spring.

But I cannot plan. I stay in each moment knowing it’s the only moment I have. There is no illusion that everything is OK. It is easy to feel overwhelmed. I want to do something but what. I want to have hope but how. I see nature’s beauty around me and want to share it. Now is not the time but when.

We all want answers. We all want solutions. Answers and solutions are not easy to find right now. Be gentle, be honest – one day to the next.

Grateful for this wisdom from Diana Butler Bass:

“Living in the present moment is a skill and a grace.  There is much wisdom in Jesus’ words: “So do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring worries of its own. Today’s trouble is enough for today” (Matthew 6:34).

Advice: Don’t do more than you need to do.  Address only what needs to be addressed today.  The best thing most of us can do is to stop the spread by distancing, advocate for those who may be most endangered, and provide what help can be given to neighbors.  Otherwise, a virus pandemic is not something we can control or fix. We can manage one day at a time, one step at a time.  Breathe.  

That’s what I know and my big advice.  Feel what you feel.  Mix in love and gratitude even if that seems hard or impossible.  Take responsibility for by what you can and don’t try to fix what is beyond your control.  Embrace the day.

And know that you are not alone.”

Safely walk

Truth may walk through the world unarmed.


Bedouin Proverb
Found in Word and Sole: Image Credit: Ivana Cajina

Rise

I rise to taste the dawn,
and find that love alone will shine today.

With delight and gratitude I greet this day. One year ago (by date), my companion- Angela- and I arrived in Davidson with a mattress for my new bed frame, a coffee maker, a card table (two chairs included) and an air mattress. The beginnings of a move like no other.

It was a spacious apartment prior to the arrival of the rest of my ‘home’. We had all we needed to settle in — just in time for my mother’s surgery. For the next few weeks there would be little time in this apartment. Enough to sleep, freshen, open a few boxes and return to the hospital. I spent many evenings by mom’s side as she began her determined recovery. Each night I would return to my new home in awe of its welcome and grateful for my companion and the quiet space.

I pause to feel the presence of grace at this sunrise. The past year was filled with the challenge and joy of settling and resettling. Living near family has created a welcome calm and delight. With both my sister and my parents the spontaneous moments for a glass of wine or evenings together to share dinner have been a gift- a gift of Time never taken for granted.

“I rise to taste this dawn…” Aware of its announcement I welcome the warming light with gratitude for all that makes a place – home – family, friends and a sense of belonging. It is here that love shines.   


Quote- KEN WILBER
Photo- JULIA BORODULINA

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better things ahead

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and so a new day begins…